~*~* All the time

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

here i am again for the sake of freedom of expression.

the past weeks have been happening. Alot of the credit goes to the bombardment of tests, tutorials and SYF. (:

i'll do some coverage about SYF, since it was a particularly hard to understand event.
Okay, so it was the SYF season which many of our school's aethestics groups took part in. Guitar's syf was scheduled on the 28th of april, which coincided with my sister's birthday. To think that we sacrificed the past few months with so many practices, in hopes of achieving that coveted gold award which our cca never did manage to achieve for all previous SYFs. Well, i can say that we really improved a major lot from the time we first learnt the pieces, and getting a gold was possible, if not, at least a silver. And finally, 28th april arrived with much anticipation because firstly, it meant that our heavy lot of practices would finally come to a closure, and secondly, the fruits of our labour shall be rewarded. We had a morning of practice and preparation and set off for republic poly about 11am. Everything was fine even till the time we entered the stage and played our two all-too-familiar pieces.

So the results were released at about 3 plus and it seemed that this year's SYF judging criteria was pretty strict and merciless. Many schools saw their previous gold award being transformed into a silver metal or even a bronze award for this SYF. And to our horror, we were awarded bronze.

The results of what we got made it to my database of "Shocking news list". Everyone else around me was equally upset and schocked as well, because seriously we felt that we deserved better than a bronze. But oh well, we could prepare all we want, practice as much as we think best and intepret the song according to our musical discretion, but ultimately, the decision lies with the judges who merely observed the few minutes of our performance without having the need to consider all the hardwork that was laid out behind the stage.

Of course i spent a long time thinking about the issue and trying to figure out why things had to turn out like that. Naturally i questioned, "Why this Lord? Why did it have to turn out like this? It was so disappointing. " Then i remembered how much i complained about the many practices and the long hours we spent with the guitar. Perhaps this was my punishment for complaining so much. But did the entire guitar have to be punished? And i remembered that many of us in guitar complained and murmured alot as well. Perhaps it was this collective effort of displeasure that we were punished for it. BUT, this is flawed thinking. Because, all things happen for a reason, a good reason, because God is Good and this attribute will never change. ( I should probably make a sign " I shall refrain from complaining" and hang it in my room )

i wondered why God couldn't just make the judges give us at least a silver. He knew and saw the amount of effort and time we put into our practices, so surely we would be rewarded right. But i forgot one thing, that man has freewill as well. God cannot force our actions, He gives us choices. And after all, this was just a competition and the results will ultimately mean nothing in the light of eternity. And competition is a system that the world has created, to distinguish what they decide to be the bad, the good and the excellent. Getting a bronze doesn't mean that we're of bronze material, because we know that we're more than just that. We've formed friendships, bonded with our guitar and picked up many pointers along the way about showmanship. So, the bronze doesn't really matter anyway. I know, i know that God had a purpose for it all, and lessons to teach. The world tells you that we're bronze, but among us, we know its more than that. Mdm Khoo said, be proud of what we achieved, because we honestly did our best, and thats enough. Yes, we know, i know. and its over.

HOWEVER, the harsh reality still remains. I heard some soul in school mention something today about guitar getting a bronze and the tone of it was obviously indicative of guitar being slighted. Well, we're the only cca in the school to get bronze while all the other ccas got like silver and many gold with honours. So, comparatively, people will definitely think that guitar is lousy. I wasn't offended or anything when i heard it but it just pointed to harsh reality and the way the world sees and values things. And of course, the battle of false fantasy and harsh reality continues. I'll never comprehend, but i'll trust you Lord.
God still spoke to me and left me a word in Job 1:22 "In all this, Job did not sin by charging God with wrongdoing."

Wow, that was a tad too much coverage for the SYF saga.

Moving onto other stuff...

Helped out at Children's Corner for the month of april. Kids are so active and so competent in being able to put a smile on your face. (:

okay, i'll stop here. I actually have more stuff to blog about but ah, another time.

(:

Mormor ~~thought~~ at.
5:30 PM

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